And You Caused It
by Not-Alone-Anymore
Summary: Forever is a word full of meaning. Eternal. Unbearable. Painful. Commitment. That's what I've always imagined it to be. Forever. And yet, so much can happen in less then a day. He told me that he was leaving. He told me he couldn't stay. Then, true to his word, he left. And I haven't seen him since.(OneShot/Songfic. Rated T just 'cause)


**I heard this song, and instantly felt I needed to write something for it. The song is Youth, by Daughter(which I don't own, obviously).**

**I also don't own The Legend of Zelda.**

_If you're still breathing you're the lucky ones  
'Cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lungs_

_Setting fire to our insides for fun  
Collecting names of the lovers that went wrong_

It hurt, watching him leave that day, knowing I'll never see him again. But still I stood there, watching, like some sort of apparition. It was near night fall, but not quite. Right when the sun lit the sky up in a myriad of purples, blues, reds, oranges, and yellows. But that information was at the back of my mind. All I felt, all I saw, all knew was him, leaving.

It was a pain that was dulled over the years. It never really left, he was always there. A bit like me, there watching him that delightful, celabratory evening, on which a crown had been placed on my head, where once a small tiara had been. That tiara had been nothing, just a little obstacle easily jumped over in that relationship. And he left when that tiny little hill was replaced by a mountain.

During the royal counsil meetings, that same dull pain had been my only companion. I grew to accept that it was a part of me, since I don't think I'll ever truly let him go. At least, not that memory of him leaving.

_And if you're still bleeding you're the lucky ones  
'Cause most of our feelings they are dead, and they are gone_

_We're setting fire to our insides for fun  
Collecting pictures from the flood that recked our home_

Then there were the times where a flash of memory would flood my mind. Him, and I, sitting, watching a rainbow by a waterfall. Or both of us looking out over it all, on that all too familiar balcony. They would leave me in tears, tears of acid in my opinion. Because that's the most emotion I've ever felt before. And yet, I could never bring myself to feel any sort of resentment towards him.

It was too hard. I've tried, because this feeling of pain that throbs in my chest has become a monotonous life style. I once thought it was because I missed him, now I'm not sure. Maybe it's self pity? Or how he chose the world of adventure over myself? Maybe it's because I thought he loved me, when he clearly did not. Maybe I thought I loved him.

Now I'm not so sure.

_And if you're in love then you are the lucky one  
'Cause most of us are bitter over someone_

_Setting fire to our insides for fun  
To distract our hearts from ever missing them,  
But I'm forever missing him_

I always thought that love was something you could not mistake, that you would know it when it hit you. It's painfully clear to me now though, that it's mistaken far too often. I have held a hatred for myself, and that's why I can't feel him here. He's still here. In my imagination. But my imagination is something completely different from reality.

A place where I can escape, where I am free to truly show my hatred, love, joy, and even sorrow. Most of my subjects call me a bitter, stale queen, someone who could never love. Perhaps they are right. I doubt I'll ever be able to love. So maybe I am just as dull as this pain that's been clouding my emotions since that day. The day I became queen, where I watched him walk away.

Maybe I was too intimidating. Or maybe I was just boring. Maybe I wasn't good enough. Or maybe I was just naive for thinking he would look at me like that. That he would ever love someone as childish, and imaginitive as me. I hate myself for this, because I know that I am at fault. I dream that I was wrong, but I wake up from those dreams because they always fade into nightmares.

I once imagined that he came back to me, that he loved me. But I know that will never happen, just like how I can't go to him. Even if I did have the courage to confess something like that. I am queen, so I should never get too emotionly attached. And still I decieve myself. Saying that I don't miss him. But I am forever missing him, no matter how much I deny it.

Forever is a word full of meaning. Eternal. Unbearable. Painful. Commitment. That's what I've always imagined it to be. Forever. And yet, so much can happen in less then a day. He told me that he was leaving. He told me he couldn't stay. Then, true to his word, he left. And I haven't seen him since.

_And you caused it._


End file.
